Stag Evening

It is rightly said that "A free mind is a devil's workshop"... I was little hesitating while writing this post... I am telling this because even after reading this, even you, especially girls would like to hate me and my few friends... This post is a description of our evening, how we get together and spend our stag evening (no girls)... I will reveal to you the secret gossip of 6 friends... Can you guess, what do a group of boys talk about, in free time?? Cheap wouldn't be a wrong word, I guess...

Boys sitting on the stairs of a forever closed shop in BTM... This is the place where hell loads of girls passes by between 5:30 to 8:30pm... Each one of us try to get off early from our offices to join the assembling on time...

I know such things can create problems if any of our partner(in future) finds out these "cheap" stuffs...Discussion is happening between six friends Puffy, Prem, Ashish, Tanuj, Avinash and Me - (Initially I thought of keeping identity secrets as this may cause problems to us and within these there are 2- half married(recently broke up) and 1 is going to hunt pretty soon- NDS wale)

Me: (I usually hated boredom and non gossip environment)- Hey, let's stop sitting quietly and do something interesting... The rest were all sitting and thinking their own stuff...

Prem:(after lighting up the cigarette) Yeah, I have an idea... why not rate these girls. Suddenly we all gave him a look.... This statement definitely caught all our attention and jutted out our mind...

What the F**K.............

Me: Oh plssssss!!! We aren't that cheap.
Puffy: Are you dim or sth? I don't want to be cuffed.
Ashish: Busy pulling his chest hair as usual, no reactions.
Tanuj: was busy with his new NEXUS(28K) cell phone.
Avinash: Count me in.

Suddenly a girl passed by talking on phone and she was like waoohhhhh.....

Prem: Hey see that female, talking on phone, see her______
Puffy and ashish: (in chorus) Where? Looking towards the direction)
Prem: Abey that female in black mini skirt (pointing in her direction)
Tanuj: Awesome... how does she manage?
Me: Micro-Mini skirt (correcting Prem)
Puffy: shit!! How can her parents allow them like this???
Ashish: Well.... I guess that's I prefer!
Me: Yes I know, but those are not well shaped.
Puffy & Tanuj: With the mouth wide open as in wonder or awe.

Now I was pretty sure that the decision to embark on this voyage of rating girls has already happened very spontaneously by all of us... So we all got into this rat business and hence we decided that it would be convenient and thus we should make some rules to avoid the complexities to rate these girls... Few rules which we made were like this:

• Never include married women(we respect them)
• Always be serious and mouth-closed (even if an angel passes by)
• If girls coming in a group, we have to rate from the closest girl and follow by the next girl in that group and so on.
• If the girls passing from left, than the guy sitting at the left most position will start the rating first followed by the adjacent one and so on... and vise-versa if girls passes by from right direction.
• Never use Hindi language for rating (if u rate a group of two girls, as 2-2 then in Hindi it will pronounce to give double meaning- hope you all know)
• We have to rate all kind of girls (give respect to all of them- even if she is black or flat or fatty kind: rate all of them)
• Neither we are supposed to do negative marking like CAT papers nor are decimal values allowed.
• Most importantly-No eye contacts(no continuous staring) & No comments and crooning.

So, we decided that we would stick to these rules and we need to play this well(morally)... and then a series of girls crossed that pathway... Girls with gorgeous eyes, groovy hair, cute smiles, deep dimples, light pimples, shiny skin, twinkling lips, best curves, fish walk, cat walk, aristocrat move or a general move... Awww, yeah!

It's always like the whole atmosphere around us glistens in the golden sun... Everytime I feel that the ambience gets electrified when a battalion of girls crosses by... The red brick on the pathway matches a lot with the red carpet on the ramp... I still remember the situation when there was a beauty amongst the entire clamour (a gorgeous groovy girl) passed our pathway and we all hushed on seeing her... Our response towards that girl was even faster than the tachometer which we uses for speed measurement... The rating was sth like this:-

Ashish: I will give her 9.5 (lost 1/2 point cus she is not with me)
Tanuj: I will go with 9.0
Avinash: 10 on 10 sir jee
Puffy: She deserves not less than 8
Prem: same here 8
Me: I will give her 9 ( definitely lovely by all standards)

A great man (not me) once said this-"Girls all over the country doing all that they could to attract guys(diet,exercise,yoga and even surgery) but they can't forget the best stalls of Bhelpuri, Tikki, Aloo chat, Samosa & Gol gappe in the city"... lol... so this is how we spend our stag evening- a lot of bantering and joking and talking some bull s*** and doing nonsense during this... But i guess this is the only time in a day when I live my life and laugh out loud at my tensions... No wonder to say that all the desired things in life are illegal, expensive or fattening...

Now, without increasing any suspense or length, I would like to gist this post by saying that nobody can rate the beauty of any girl... It is that we PRAISE your BEAUTY!!!

Keep Walking!!!